Miss Moving On

I managed to avoid Nick and his hussey for the rest of the day Saturday, but the encounter put a serious damper on my mood. I was mad at him for ruining my day, and even madder at myself for caring enough to let him. 

On Sunday, a group of us decided to grab brunch before tackling the long drive back. We sat around a too-small table at one of our favorite restaurants in town, reminiscing on the weekend. It felt just like I was in college again. But if this weekend was any indicator, I was so glad to be a fully-functioning adult in the real world. I could not hang the way these 20-year-olds could, it was borderline insane. 

Halfway through brunch, Spence shot me a look from across the table. I furrowed my brow at her, confused. What? I mouthed across the table. She cast a pointed side-eyed glance across the room and I followed her gaze... to where Nick was walking in the door. Taking a deep breath, I turned back to Spencer and rolled my eyes. I was not going to react. 

Spotting us, Nick walked over to the table. “Hey guys,” he said awkwardly. 

“Nick!” said my friend Rachel, standing up to give him a hug. “We didn’t see you all weekend!” 

“I know,” he replied. “I was at the tailgate yesterday… but only for a little while.” He continued to chat with a few of my friends and I remained fixated on my basket of chicken fingers. My friends knew we weren’t together anymore and I was silently praying one of them would send him on his merry way. 

“Dani?” he said, snapping me out of my zone. I glanced up at him, raising my eyebrows. “I said do you want to come outside with me for a second?” he shifted his weight uncomfortably. Good, I thought, squirm. 

Silently, I pushed my chair out and walked out the door. I didn’t turn around until I was on the busy street, people clad in Penn State gear pushing past me. He appeared a moment later looking uncomfortable with both of his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans.

“What?” I said flatly. 

“You didn’t answer any of my calls last night,” he said.

I snorted. “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to pull you away from your new girlfriend.” 

He sighed loudly “She is not my girlfriend, okay? She’s the little sister of one of my buddies, and she let us stay with her for the weekend.” 

“And I see you were extremely grateful for that,” I retorted. “Look, I don’t get to see these girls often so I’m going back inside,” I said, starting to walk past him. He grabbed my wrist and turned me around.

“Don’t be like this Danielle,” he said sharply. 

“Like what!” I was fed up at this point. Fed up with conversations that led nowhere, fed up with his bullshit and most of all fed up with being stuck in love with him. 

He released my wrists and ran his hands through his hair, something he always did when he got frustrated with a situation. I narrowed my eyes at him, waiting for a response I knew would never come. Looking him in the eyes I shrugged, letting him know there was nothing more to be said. I walked back inside to where my friends were waiting. 

“So?” Spencer asked, speaking for the whole group. 

I shook my head “So nothing, he always tries to fix things by standing there and looking sorry. I’m over it.” I didn’t realize until I heard the words coming out of my own mouth how much I truly meant them.