Ex-Flings on Fridays

On Thursday, I got a notification from our HR department that I still had eight unused vacation days to take before December 31. Normally this would make me ecstatic, but taking off work was pretty tough these days. Unused days didn't roll over into the next year, nor did we get cashed out for them so it was either use it or lose it. I couldn't even take them over the holidays since our office typically closed from Christmas Eve until January 1. #FirstWorldProblems

I took a peek at my calendar and chose a few days around Thanksgiving that I could feasibly take, but that still left me with five more. Then, noticing that our regular staff meeting was cancelled for this Friday I decided - why not just take the whole day off? I could sleep in, shop, get a blow out and look perfectly put together when I arrived in Philly that night. Unlike the usual 12 hour workday hot mess version of me that typically greeted Dylan. My duties could easily fall to other people for the day and I could would keep an eye on social media and my email for any emergencies. 

I emailed the request to my boss and within minutes she sent me back a simple "Fine". I was giddily planning all of the things I could do with my 24 hours of complete freedom, when I got a text from Nick. 

Sooo it's Thursday and I still haven't gotten that drink with you.. free tonight?

I stared at the phone, debating how to respond. I had never made a decision on whether or not to meet up with him and instead just avoided it like a responsible human. I didn't want to completely sever a friendship just because I was with someone new, but I also didn't want to be a hypocrite. 

I took off work tomorrow so I foresee a late night in the office tonight.. sorry :(

I felt satisfied with my response, since it was the truth. As curious as I was about his new-found reality TV fame, I couldn't shake the feeling of guilt that hovered over me like a cloud every time I talked to Nick. 

Well isn't that a coincidence - I'm off tomorrow too. We have promo obligations in the morning. Meet me for lunch? I won't take no for an answer, D. 

Was it weird that his persistence turned me on a little?

Fine.. but it can't be a long lunch. I have a very busy day.

I replied. If by busy I meant I could squeeze in a sandwich and some awkward ex-boyfriend sexual tension between my manicure and blow out.


The next morning, I stayed in bed until 10 and reveled in the gloriousness of sleeping in. I padded into the shower and blasted Arty while shaving every inch of my body in anticipation for Dylan tonight. My hair appointment was at 11:30, and then I was due to meet Nick at a small pizza place down in TriBeCa at 1:00. 

I spent a little too long on my makeup, but after all I hadn't seen Nick without it being a drunken disaster situation in weeks, maybe even months. I'm a pretty solid advocate that it's always a good idea to look ridiculously hot when dining with an ex. 

By the time my hair had been scrubbed, massaged and blown-out, I definitely looked like I was trying too hard. The warm weather allowed for a flowy dress paired with booties, and my long brown hair was caressing my shoulders in soft waves. 

"Going somewhere special?" The girl at the TriBeCa DryBar asked me when I was trying to calculate my tip.

"Um.. a lunch thing now, but heading to see my boyfriend down in Philly tonight," I said.

"Well isn't he a lucky man," she replied with a wink. I smiled back at her politely. 

Out on the street, I slung my brown tote over my shoulder and decided to walk over to the pizza place he had suggested. I was staring at my phone, trying to navigate the foreign streets of TriBeCa when Nick's name popped up on my screen.

Hey- running a few min late. Be there by 1:15. 

I rolled my eyes, nothing bothered me as much as lateness. I found the restaurant and grabbed a small table by the window. 

"Anything to drink?" the waiter greeted me almost immediately. 

"Umm.." I said, scanning the menu. Was it too early for a cocktail? Is there such a thing as too early for a cocktail when your ex is involved?

"Will you judge me if I order a dirty martini?" I asked him with a flirtatious smile. Maybe if I acted slutty he wouldn't judge me as much.. at least not for the drinking before 2 p.m.

"Not at all," he said with a laugh. "As long as you don't make it a double." with that, he winked and sauntered off to the bar. 

By the time Nick showed up, I was on my second martini and had answered seven work e-mails. 

"I'm so sorry," he breezed in, pecking me on the cheek before sitting down. "I never know how long this stuff is going to go. We were supposed to end at 11." 

He eyed my drink, raising an eyebrow with a smug smile. "A little early for that isn't it Miss Fitzgerald?"  

"It's Friday and I am off work - don't judge," I said flatly, taking in with annoyance how incredible he looked. Over the last few weeks he had clearly been working out, and his blonde hair was cropped short accentuating his blue eyes. He had about two days worth of scruff on his chin and his summer tan had yet to fade away.

"You look good," I said, meaning it. 

"You look more than good," he replied, his eyes lingering on mine for two seconds too long.

"So," I replied, breaking the tension. "What were you guys up to this morning? Promos for the show?"

He nodded, reaching for the bread bowl and ripping apart a roll. 

"Yeah, we were down at Z100 this morning, which went way longer than expected because they had us taping promos to air later in the week," he said. "I met Elvis Duran though, which was so fucking cool."

"Oh my god! That's awesome," I said, remembering how many mornings I used to spend listening to his show. "So tell me, how did this all even happen?" 

"The show?" he asked.

"No, the airstrikes against ISIS," I said. "Yes the show!"

"It was so fast.. and weird to be honest. One day I was just out at the bar for happy hour with my buddies, and this girl approached us and gave me her card. A few weeks later I'm at a 'new job' with cameras everywhere. I really wasn't going to do it, until I saw the contract. The money is incredible."

"So.. you left your old job?" I asked.

"Yeah, but I have a new one.. sort of. It's been a lot of filming and really no training. To be honest, I don't know what will happen when this all airs."

Sensing he didn't want to discuss it further, I let the matter drop. Even though I still had a million more questions. How was a reputable company allowing him to film on property? Was he really employed? What would happen when the show ends?

Instead, the waiter arrived and Nick ordered a beer and two flatbreads for us to split. 

"So," he said after the waiter had left. "How's Danny?"

I rolled my eyes, unwilling to take the bait. "Dylan is great, I'm actually heading down there in a few hours."

Nick's face fell, but he quickly recovered, fast enough that I wasn't even sure if it had actually happened or if the second martini was messing with me.

"Well, I'm happy for you," he said, looking me dead in the eye.

"Don't say it if you don't mean it,"I bantered, giving him a weak smile.

"In that case, I'm terribly unhappy for you," he replied, making me laugh. 

We spent the rest of lunch catching up, dancing around the topic of his TV show. As the date -er- meal went on I felt my heart swelling with affection for him, but I couldn't pinpoint why. On one hand, I was scared of this tiny show somehow slingshotting him into the depths of fame where I would be nothing more than his college girlfriend. On the other, I was terrified of the fact that I couldn't stop staring at his lips. 

I'm in love with Dylan, I'm in love with Dylan, I kept repeating to myself in my head. It had just been two weeks since I had seen Dylan, and I was horny and lonely and that was currently being projected onto Nick. But that would all be solved in just a few hours.

When the check came, Nick insisted on paying. 

"Thanks," I said, nibbling on a remaining piece of crust. 

"When is your train?" he asked, as we stood up and headed out of the tiny restaurant. 

"Not for another few hours, I still need to go home and pack," I said, glancing wistfully at my watch.

"Okay, well, have a good trip," Nick said, enveloping me in a hug. His familiar scent wafted all around me and, my arms betraying me, wrapped themselves around his neck as my fingers wound themselves into his hair. I buried my face in his neck, pressing my lips together until they turned white to avoid saying anything I would regret. 

"Thanks," I said, my words muffled by his shoulder. I pulled apart and looked up at him, wanting to kiss him but knowing I couldn't, and that he wouldn't. 

He tugged at a piece of my hair and turned around, walking uptown.