Double Standard

I was annoyingly anxious the entire time Dylan was in Vegas. By nature, I am an extremely worrisome person - constantly assessing situations trying to find how things could go wrong. Yes, I know this is a negative trait but I just don't see it changing anytime soon.

Therefore, all day Friday and Saturday I was incessantly checking my phone, waiting for one of Dylan's comrades to call and break the news that he had either A) taken some sort of illegal drug that was laced with bath salts and then proceeded to eat someones face off (I know, that's so 2012) or B) fallen head over heels in love with a stripper and ran away with her to California to start their lives together drinking kale smoothies and taking up windsurfing. 

Both highly unlikely scenarios, but I was still glued to my phone anyway. It didn't help matters that Dylan sent me about one text every 8 hours, usually littered with spelling errors that were dead giveaways of his current level of drunkenness. 

By Saturday evening, I knew I had to get out of the house for a distraction. So I texted Elena and persuaded her to meet me out for drinks. As I was getting ready in my room with Ellie Goulding blaring, I decided to wave the white flag and invite Ashley as well. We'd spent nearly a week now acting like polite acquaintances and I was ready to stop freezing her out. 

"Ash?" I asked, rapping twice on her door. 

"Come in," she replied. I opened the door to find her curled in a ball on her bed, book in hand. 

"I'm going to meet Elena for drinks, do you want to come?" I offered.

She looked at me skeptically. "Does this mean you're done treating me like I have Ebola?" 

I rolled my eyes at her but smiled, perching on the side of her bed.

"That depends, are you done romping around with your basically betrothed ex?" 

"It's complicated," she said, sitting up to face me.

"Well lay it out for me," I said, waving my arms open. 

She sighed. "I don't know, Dani. It's just so easy with him. It's almost like we needed this break to figure things out."

"Ash," I started, choosing my next words carefully. "Has he told you this? Because when he broke the news to me about Adriana-" I saw her wince at my direct use of her name, "-he told me that he had never felt this way before." 

"People always say that in the beginning of relationships though," she defended. "It's sunshine and butterflies and mind-blowing sex the first few months." 

I considered this, knowing I was in no position to disagree considering Dylan and I were currently King and Queen of honeymoon land. 

"So what, he is just going to leave her for you now?" I asked.

"No! I don't know. It's just so confusing. I mean he slept here last weekend and yes, we hooked up. But we've hung out twice since and all we have done is talk. I'm just waiting for him to figure out what he wants." 

"But how is this fair to Adriana?" I asked. "You're the other woman!" 

"Last time I saw him, we decided to just not talk for a few days and figure out everything," she said.

"Well what do you want?" 

"Him," she replied, steadfast and sure. 

I considered her skeptically. Ash was a prime example of someone who constantly wanted what she couldn't have. 

"I just want you to be sure. I mean you can't go back to him and then leave him again," I said.

"I know that," she replied. 

"Also, he might not even want you back, you have to be prepared for that," I continued. 

"I know! Ugh I don't want to talk about this right now, please," Ash said gently. 

"Okay," I replied and we sat in silence for a few moments.

"Do you still want to come out with us?" I offered.

"Sure," she said. "Yes. That would be great." 

I debated hugging her, but it felt a little too Full House-y so instead I stood up.

"Great, be ready in 20?" 

She nodded her head and I retreated back into my room to get dressed.


A little while later, Ash, Elena and I were sitting at a table at a small bar in Union Square sipping on Dirty Martinis. The two of them were immersed in a conversation about AcroYoga, something that Elena had recently taken up.

"You two definitely need to come," she said enthusiastically taking a sip of her drink. 

"I'm in!" I interjected. "Also, we need more drinks." I scanned the room for our waitress, flagging her down.

"So," Elena said, changing the subject from fitness to men. "Gimmie the deets on that Nick/TV show thing!" 

"What TV show?" Ashley asked, confused. Due to the cold war that had been taking place in our apartment all week, I had never gotten around to telling her. I quickly filled her in on the promo I had seen on TV, and the text I had sent him after seeing it.

"Ohmygod, that's so cool. You dated a celebrity," Ash said, and I rolled my eyes.

"Hardly. He said that they only filmed like, four episodes." 

"That's all the details you got from him?" Elena asked, looking disappointed. "How did he get into it?" 

I shrugged, "No idea. He seemed kind of embarrassed when I brought it up. But he did ask me to get drinks with him next week."

"Why?" Elena asked. "He knows you're with Dylan right?" 

"Yes," I said. "But we are still friendly, and he said he'd give me all of the details over drinks."

"Did you say yes?" Ashley asked. 

"I said maybe," I replied, downing the last of my drink. "I just told him my schedule was pretty full next week but I would text him if I had the time." Which was a bold faced lie, I just wasn't sure the protocol for drinks with an ex when you have a brand new beautiful boyfriend.

"Hmm," Elena mused outloud. 

"Yes, oh wise one?" I asked her. 

"I just think that if Dylan were to go to drinks with Kara you'd flip a shit, it seems like a double standard." 

I let this sit for a minute, considering what she was saying. From my perspective, Nick and Kara were two completely different relationships. But when I looked at it factually, they did seem pretty similar. They were both in the picture when Dylan and I met, and they both tried hard to be with us. 

"I guess you're right," I said, as our second round of drinks appeared. The guy who dropped them at our table was not our waitress, but instead appeared to be the bartender. The bartender with gorgeous green eyes and dark locks that reminded me of Adrian Grenier in Entourage. 

"Thanks," I swooned, practically drooling over his biceps. 

"You're welcome," he replied and I detected a hint of a Boston accent.

I turned to Elena, wide-eyed and salivating. 

"Oh. My. God." she said. "Mine!" 

I laughed out loud, "See! I told you coming out more would open the door to prospects."

"Oh settle down," she said with a giggle. "First we have to make sure he's not gay, taken or into weird sex stuff."

"Hey, don't knock the weird sex stuff until you try it," Ashley chimed in with a grin. 

"Operation get Elena sexy bartender's number, commence!" I said, and we all cheersed.